okay some old gathering pictures here! when was this i cant remember. i only remember us celebrating jess' birthday and laughing over the 'coughing' joke. LOL.


i dont frequent msn anymore. i mean, once in a while i still do. but i think logging in is a waste of time. LOL. idk, is that a good thing?

anyway, i logged in a while ago and saw liwhey's offline message which made me smile, although what she typed was pretty ridiculous + made me sound like some 花痴. LOLL.

ו MRS.이.미친 wHAE •× ★ - says
haha lemme share sth with you during my korean lesson today :x

ו MRS.이.미친 wHAE •× ★ - says
the teacher teaching us to write korean bands names like super junior, big bang, shinee all those.. den she mentioned..
you all know onew? from super junior? den me -- -.-???

ו MRS.이.미친 wHAE •× ★ - says
everyone: shinee laaa
HAHAHA immediately onew links to you and den shinee :X

and qianhui too! she left me a LINK. hiak hiak hiak. am totally lovin' it.

102 days to Alevels.
am trying to "jump" (in our principal, Mr Kwek's context) as much everyday already.
as i have said, i dont want a miracle. i just hope for my hardwork to payoff.
俐洁加油.

my previous post was super duper emo. hate it. not gonna look back anymore.

thanks all for the concern.
and jianing who was worried (i assumed, LOL!) for waking me up from my nap this afternoon THRICE just to ask if i was feeling okay.
in fact, no! i was feeling frustrated, not due to my results but the fact that she woke me up thrice... *screams*
but i get it, hahaha. thanks! ♥

all rights, shall wait no more.
i love studying man, seriously, how can i not?
LOL. shall go do what i 'love' right now.
BUH BYE!

it just hurts so much knowing that you are still at the bottom even after putting in so much effort. guess im not improving afterall, and i wont be able to improve in time for As.
it's time to start planning - on where to go after jc. should i fly to America? get some piercings maybe, dye my hair bright orange, go clubbing every night, and smoke. *shrugs*

what can i really say. im seriously scared. but nothing seems to be working. or maybe my karma is running low. or or or, karma doesnt play a part at all. i should transform myself into a bad person soon. you think?

i guess not. HAHA. dont worry. i wont 想不开. i just thought i would have been happier if... oh well. no point talking about it anymore. everyone is facing it, i am too, trying once again.

but do you know how hurtful it is when i break the news to my parents? and i got pissed (plus a little rude) when mummy asked:"为什么会这样!?" come on, i want the answer too. i have tried umpteen ways but i never fail to fail. so stop replying me like that. it just hurts so so so so so much. i must be such an asshole, such a disappointment, such a disgrace.
im just.............. so sorry.

im scared. okay, how many times am i going to repeat it? but seriously, who understands? try retaining, with that painful memory carved in your mind.

kkay, am feeling better now after crying. i was feeling pretty low this afternoon, but i just couldnt let my tears out. not that i dont want to, i cant. i thought i was immuned to low grades. and i seriously had the urge to squeeze some tears out, together with my eyeballs if possible.
[thank you huipin for the hug. i appeared calm when you approached. but your hug really meant alot.]

i swear i would be happier if im a dimwit.
i dont want knowledge, i dont want disappointments, i dont want pressure, i dont want to fake a smile, i dont want reality blah blah blahs.
BECAUSE THEY STING, THEY REALLY STING. WTF.

anyway anyway anyway, on a side note, SHINee's LUCIFER IS LOVE.
besides the haunting memory of my grades in 2008, LUCIFER is all i think about now.
yes, not even my dream wedding, not even "OASIS" is helping...

SHINee's new album! :D
awesome awesome awesome.
feeling super energised.
shall start studying in 10minutes' time.
*smiles*

SHINee's new mv will be out tomorrow!
omo omo omo, shall stay in school to study til i feel accomplished before coming home to watch their new mv.

but friday, there's econs supplementary! *cries out loud*
this means i cant watch SHINee's comeback stage live. ='(

class clique has been talking alot about our marriage preferences recently. i think i was the one who started all these. did i influence them? haha. and after reading dawn's post on her dream wedding, it makes me wanna blog about it too. lol.
but sorry huh, im busy SHINee-ing STUDYING. ♥

yesterday was our very last photo-taking in NYJC.
im glad that the phototaking was before we take back our papers, if not i wont have smiled. lol.
my maths results was disastrous by the way. i dont have a good feeling for the other subjects too...

ah well anyway! phototaking yesterday was pretty nice. not as fun as last year's or last last year's though... i dont know, im sentimental now, probably because im getting old. *rolls eyes*

fun shots' concepts were soft toys and shades.
hey 0830! i brought along the soft toy you guys gave last year during valentines'! ♥

and we started playing with stanley's lao kok kok shades!
omg omg omg. super hilarious. hahaha.


i have tonnes of work to settle. goodbye computer for the time being. am gonna hit my target before sunday. 'cos it's gathering once again! ♥
ELLEKAY, FIGHTING!

last paper on wednesday!
and it was sleepover at jianing's house. had partyworld in the middle of the night and Despicable Me the next day! such an adorable movie i tell you. ;)

then after that was tuition. drifted off to lala land several times. haha. cos i didnt sleep well at jianing's house! i woke up and stared into space every 45mins while the other 4girls seemed to be deep asleep, watched the videos i have in my phone blah blah. lol. so was totally shag during tuition. i couldnt even recognise the bus route home and i panicked cos i thought i took the wrong bus. zzz.

i swear im not gonna touch on schoolwork till tuesday. i swear swear swear.

am watching ROAD NUMBER 1 on dramacrazy right now. guess what, it's on korean war. when the south koreans saw tanks (they call it cannon on wheels) for the first time. HAHA. anyway, im off now to continue watching. byes!

have been studying the easy/relaxing way for the past few days. totally no stress at all. i wonder if this is a bad thing. lol. anyway, anyhow, at least ive studied.

was talking to zhiwei on msn and she made me laugh big time. may our wishes come true. ♥

okie dokie. im off now. i cant seem to be able to make myself fall in love with econs' market failure. shall make it love me instead of forcing myself to love it. haha. byebye.

im done with IRIS! yeah, you can say "finally" cos it took me more than half a year to finish the whole series. thanks to "my life". :(
anyway, i have finished it, so im pretty much a happy girl.
but only for now, cos i vowed to get back to "my life" tomorrow and prepare for the papers which i will be taking next week.

MYEs (excluding those that i wd be taking next week) were, like what the others said, a genocide. maths looked simple, but i literally lost 60marks. i wonder how much i will get this time round after all the studying. i prepared for maths the most if you were wondering... so the results, probably worse than my block tests? i couldnt imagine.
next on my guilt list is chemistry. although it was pretty much a last minute preparation, i gave it my all. but guess what, almost the whole paper was filled with organic chemistry which i just got to learn the basic genes of it from kathy mam. i still reached school slightly earlier that day to do last minute cramming, which did help a little, but not enough to save me.

this feeling, i dont know how to describe it. i swear i wont let this feeling get to me again. not for prelims, not for Alevels.
but for now.....................
let me indulge myself with more videos first kay! :D
am watching Raising Idols now, featuring Dongho from UKISS, Key from SHINee, and Thunder from MBLAQ.
*jumps around*

oh and besides that, last night i have officially started on Harvest Moon Hero of Leaf Valley on my brother's psp. my brother was right. Nak, the blue harvest sprite was super cute. heh.

reality will slap me hard soon enough. tomorrow i will resume on my usual daily routine. dont worry kay mummy, daddy, and how can i forget, kathy mam. lol. dont worry dont worry. LOL.

SIGH. i totally love how i have wasted my day away today.
and i dont want to pave way for reality.

ah well, i changed my mind. am stopping videos, shall continue with my harvest moon! ♥

tan leekeat.
ellekay.
elle_kay0114@hotmail.com

Leekeat Tan |